Retreat

I just returned from a retreat a "treat" I gave myself- a time to heal, a time to feel, a time where I have no time schedule other than the two appointments I had with Emmett Miller, a physician and coach from Nevada City, California. Normally my life is pretty distracted with technology-blogs and websites and emails and also the myriad of home responsibilities and relationships. My retreat is a time for me to step back without a computer-just a journal and read the books I have wanted to read; write without a specific goal or deadline; sit in the fresh air and listen to the birds and the wind blowing through the trees. and although annoying, share space with the bees who are curious about me as I sit outside invading their peace.
I was in Nevada City, California staying in the mountain, where my cell phone did not work. This was nice too.I couldn't distract myself with a phone call either that I initiated or that I just had to answer.

Every morning I woke up very early, between 3 and 5 AM. This was natural as I was still on Cincinnati time. I stayed in a small studio apartment. There was no coffee pot so I went to the local thrift store and bought a really nice Braun drip coffee maker for $3.00. I love fresh coffee in the morning in a real cup. Then I would go out on my little deck, wrapped in a blanket, and just sit in the early morning air. At this time of the year in Northern California it is cool in the morning, although by mid morning the sun was strong and the temperatures would rise, reaching at least 75 degrees during the day. As I came down from the mountain the temperatures were even warmer. Not one day went by without sunshine. It was a beautiful week.

I shared my outside space with several deer, who were not shy at all. They came rather close and we simply made eye contact with a mutual understanding and agreement that peace was peace and we would not disturb each other. After a morning of sitting, reading, writing and reflecting, I would take a short walk in the woods and then leave for the day and go into the small towns of Nevada City and Grass Lake.

This is gold country, the home of the early gold mines between California and Nevada. I did not know that Nevada was the name of this California town long before the state of Nevada became reality. They had to add city to the name after Nevada became a state. So now there is Nevada City, California, located between Reno, Nevada and the capitol of California -Sacramento.

I felt right at home. There was a Prius everywhere I turned. I just got my little hybrid this month and not only love the drive but love the idea that somehow I am doing something good for the earth. The people made me feel at home too-casual, friendly, and free spirited.

Although I enjoyed the shops and restaurants, I used this time for something deeper, more serious perhaps, but precious time to stop all of the frenzy of life and go inside to the hidden spaces I cover up in my heart. Those places of hurt and pain, places where feelings lay buried, and bring up to the surface questions I have little time to answer.

When it is time to return home, I feel a sense of clarity of purpose, and a renewed sense of love for everyone and everything.

My flights all went smoothly. My rent a car was a trusted friend. I got back to Cincinnati very late because I flew in and out of Columbus, leaving me to drive an hour and a half after my arrival at 10:30 Friday night. I got back to Cincinnati about 12:30 AM, but still on California time, it felt kind of like my drive back up the mountain after a day in town.

I put in the CD my daughter Marcie made for me last Mother's Day and enjoyed my drive home listening to songs about searching, peace, life, and love.

I walked in the door and there was my husband. We embraced and loved each other even more than ever.
It is this time we take away from each other that brings us closer. I also loved my home more and realize I have my own deck and my own trees and my own bees and if I am quiet, the deer will visit too. If only I could take time away from the technological distractions and all the things I think my house and work are calling me to do.

A retreat need not be a week in California, but simply an hour to sit, read a book, write in my journal or walk in the woods. It's all right here. And my heart goes with me wherever I go, ready to be open and authentic if only I stay in touch.

Thank you Emmett, for reminding me of inner and outer beauty and life's rich experience awaiting my acceptance once I step out of the way of thinking I know my direction.

Comments

[Your Anonymous Son]

Mom,

I read your retreat blog. Very well said. Your conclusion mimics what I was thinking while reading the blog - that our everyday life can be similar to our vacations or retreats if we allow it. Much easier said than done. Happy mother's day!